“Shit! They’re coming! Quick, everybody hide!”
That was our cue to disappear in Gayle’s house and pretend that we had not been running around preparing for her husband Mike’s surprise birthday party later that night. We were not finished decorating and getting all the food ready, but we weren’t supposed to be. My own husband, Drew, was taking Mike out to divert his attention for a while. A smaller group of their closest friends had gathered early to help Gayle get ready. We were the core group of friends who had all gone to college together. Now in our late 30s, it had been a while since we had partied like we did during our campus days. We hoped to recapture some of that magic that night.
Debbi and I ran for the coat closet following Akai. Those helping Gayle in the kitchen hid in the pantry, while the ones blowing up balloons on the upstairs landing took their decorations and went into one of the upstairs guest bedrooms. Mike and Drew would only be there long enough for Mike to change out of his racquet ball clothes and put on his Giant’s jersey for the afternoon game Drew was taking him to. We wouldn’t have to hide for long, but we needed to be absolutely still and not make a bit of noise.
The coat closet was a tight fit for the three of us, but as we heard Mike and Drew’s laughter at the front door, we didn’t have time for one of us to run someplace else. We had to get out of sight fast. Someone was going to have to squat on the floor under the coats and jackets. Akai looked like he didn’t want to kneel but two stern looks from Debbi and I let him know that there was no use putting up a fuss. We were both wearing skirts and heels, and there was no way we were going to squat down in that closet. On his knees he went as Debbi and I squeezed in shoulder-to-shoulder in front of him. Gayle shut us in as she went to greet her husband and his best friend at the door. We were ensconced in total darkness.
I head Gayle greet Mike with a kiss as Drew began to describe their plans for the rest of the afternoon. He was doing it as much for the benefit of us in hiding as for Gayle, so that we would all know how much time we had to finish getting the house ready. It was all according to the plan Gayle had come up with. Mike’s actual birthday wasn’t until Tuesday and it was only Saturday. Anticipating that a large group of us would go out for dinner next weekend, we had Drew take Mike out for a day of one-on-one man time. He had no clue that his house was already full of people getting ready for a party that night.
That’s when we heard Mike announce that he wanted to get in a quick shower before they left again. That sure threw a wrench in our plans. They were supposed to have both showered at the gym after their racquet ball game, but this meant that we had to stay hidden for a bit longer than we’d planned. As Mike ran to his shower, Gayle peaked in on us and asked if we were ok, then she shut us back in and offered Drew something to drink.
We felt Akai shifting his position behind us. “If we’re going to be here for a while,” he whispered, “I need to get more comfortable. I’m sitting on something that’s sticking up into my butt!”
“Good!” I whispered back. “You deserve a good stick up the butt,” I chuckled.
“Given our relative positions, I would hold my tongue if I were you, Nivia, less what I’m sitting on finds its way up your butt.”
“Shhh!” Debbie scolded us. “Don’t you two get started.”
She was right, Akai and I had a history of ribbing each other and we could get out of hand quite easily. It had all started 18 years ago when the two of us worked in the same dorm cafeteria on campus. One night after our shift Akai had humiliated me so badly that deep down I had never really forgiven him for it, even though he apologized over and over for the next two years until we graduated. He swore that my humiliation wasn’t his intent, but that was little consolation. We didn’t speak of it any longer because I hated to be reminded of how humiliated he’d made me feel, but I never passed up an opportunity to give him shit. Truthfully, I was still hoping one day to embarrass him, if only half as bad as he had humiliated me.
Even though Debbie had admonished us to be quiet, I still couldn’t resist having the last word. In this instance, instead of coming up with another retort I used my heel to find his thigh behind me and pushed it into his flesh just hard enough to get a hiss out of him. I smiled to myself in the dark, thinking I had gotten the better of him, until I felt him reach up and pinch my ass, just enough to sting. The bastard! Out of all the pats of my body, he knew I was most sensitive about my butt. In fact, it was the source of my humiliation all those years ago…
*****
“Akai, can we go home now?” my friend Samara asked after we had finished wiping down all the tables and cleaned out the salad bar. We had a test to study for and wanted to get an early start. It was already 8:30. Akai was the student manager, and it was his job to make sure after the dinner shift that the cafeteria was in spotless shape for the breakfast crew the next morning. The six of us who worked the dinner shift were all anxious to get out of there.
“Not yet. Someone needs to stay and help me mop the floors. Samara, I think it’s your turn,” Akai responded. “The rest of you can go.”
“Aww man!” she whined. “That will take forever!”
“Well, you could just ask Nivia to scoot around on her butt with a couple of wet towels. She’d finish the whole floor in just five minutes.”
Uncontrollable nervous laughter exploded out of everyone, except me. I couldn’t believe my ears. We were used to joking around. Akai kept things light and playful on the job, and that was the best part of working there. It paid better than most all other campus jobs because most students didn’t want to do food service work. We played around so much, with secret food fights, eating contests, and taking free food back to our dorms, that the three hour shifts seemed to fly by. But talking about my big butt was taking things too far. I was mortified, and Samara could see the look of horror on my face. In solidarity, she stopped her own laughter to chastise Akai.
“That was cruel, Akai!” she said. A few other students nodded in agreement, trying hard to stifle their laughter, and failing.
“Come on now, I wasn’t trying to be mean. Having a big ass is a beautiful thing,” he asserted. More chuckles from the crowd. I turned about four different shades of red.
“You’re not helping,” Samara said. “Just shut up before you make it any worse.”
“Nivia,” he turned to me, “I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, but big bubble butts are really hot. I was giving you a compliment.”
Try as I could to come up with a witty reply, I was too flustered. After stammering for a moment, I just ran out. I could hear Akai pleading his case to the rest of our co-workers as I ran from the industrial kitchen. I headed straight to my dorm room, hoping to just lose myself in my course work, but that humiliation stung for a long time. I was hopelessly distracted for the rest of that night. For the rest of my time in college, I couldn’t stand anyone paying any attention to my behind. In fact, if I was honest about it, the reason I felt comfortable with and became so close with Drew was because he paid absolutely no attention to my rear. He was much more into my frontal assets, and that was just perfect for me.
In the cafeteria the next day, I couldn’t even talk to Akai, though he tried to make light conversation with me numerous times. At the end of our shift, he didn’t even bother looking in my direction when looking for someone to mop. I left without a word.
Later that night there was a knock on my door. It was Akai. “I came to make sure we’re cool, Nivia” he said when I opened the door. “I talked to Samara and she told me that you are still pretty upset with me. So I figured I would come over and try to explain what I meant and say once more that I really wasn’t trying to insult you.”
“I think I’ve heard enough of your explanations,” I growled at him.
“Just give me five minutes,” he pleaded. I relented and let him come in. He went on and on but it was all in one ear and out the other as far as I was concerned. When someone touches a nerve of your deepest insecurities, it’s hard to entertain any notion that your fears about your shortcomings are irrational. Perhaps what bothered me most was that he never actually said he was sorry, but just kept going on about how having a big butt was a good thing, not a bad one. Out of pride to not let on just how deeply I’d been cut, I said that all between us was well, but in my heart I was still smarting. But that was the start of our têt-a-têt and from then on, at every opportunity I gave him shit. It never got ugly or deeply personal, but all of our friends knew that if we were in a room together that we’d rib each other relentlessly to see who could get more people laughing at the other.
Though he never again teased me about my butt, every once-in-a-while I would turn around and find Akai’s eyes glued to my rear end. Caught like a kid sneaking candy after being forbidden to do so, at those instances Akai would let his guard down and look at me with lust filled eyes and a sinister smile. “Nivia, you really should let me show you just how sexy that thing you’re sitting on is,” he’d say.
“Dream on,” I’d tell him. I reckoned that he was one of those guys who liked to spank a girl or slap her on the ass during sex, and I had no interest in such a thing. It was unmistakable in my tone that I would never let him anywhere near my butt. Lord knows I could never bend over when he was anywhere around. If I did, it was like inviting his stares. To his credit, no matter how many times I’d rebuff what I interpreted as his pathetic attempts to make me feel better about my ass, he never stopped trying.
“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” he’d say, almost under his breath, shaking his head at me. The look in his eyes would convey that I just didn’t know what I was missing. I had no desire to know any such thing. He stopped asking once I started seriously dating Drew in my junior year. Akai was a senior, and we both still worked in the cafeteria, but Drew was one of his friends and he didn’t want to be disrespectful. But he never stopped looking. If I caught him staring at it, he’d just smile a wicked smile and turn away. That continued after college and through both of our marriages. He was so slick about it. Neither Drew nor Akai’s wife Alicia ever seemed to catch him doing it but if we were alone, or if his line of sight was just right, I could bet money on where his eyes would be.
******
That was the shared history we brought with us into Mike’s and Gayle’s dark cramped closet that afternoon. When he pinched my butt, I felt all the old sting of how he’d first humiliated me almost 20 years ago come rushing back into my mind. Without thinking I took my heel and dug it into his thigh even harder. Undeterred, his right hand reached up to join his left and he pinched me on both cheeks simultaneously. I pushed back with my butt to try and shake his hands away and I felt my right cheek make contact with the left side of his face. A wicked idea came to mind and I braced myself against the door jamb and pushed back into his face even harder.
‘That’ll teach him,’ I thought to myself. ‘I’ll make him sit trapped in this closet for the next 5 minutes with my ass shoved in his face and see how he likes it.’ So I pushed back hard. Taking him by surprise, I felt him squirm trying to get his face out of my butt. I was relentless and kept it pressed firmly into him. In whatever direction I felt his face move, my butt was there to greet it. A chuckle escaped out of me, too tickled with what I was doing. Debbie heard my tiny laughter and our commotion and shushed us again.
“You two are going to get us caught!” she admonished, poking me in the ribs. She was right so I relented. Satisfied that I got the better of him this time, I straightened my back and pulled my ass out of Akai’s face. Almost immediately, two strong hands came up to grab each of my hips and pulled me back. I froze. With a tight grip, Akai held my waist firmly in place and then slowly resumed rubbing his face all over my backside. Like he liked it!
At first I was just shocked. I was genuinely perplexed at why anyone would voluntarily do such a thing. ‘Eww!’ I thought. If he was trying to humiliate me again, it was sure a weird way of doing it. When he didn’t stop right away I began to feel uncomfortable. My ass was my biggest insecurity about myself and he knew it. What was he trying to prove? Once it became clear that he had no plans of stopping, it finally dawned on me: he was actually enjoying it!
A million thoughts raced through my mind. I didn’t want to raise a commotion and clue Debbie into what was going on. I also didn’t want Gayle or Mike to hear any rumblings in the closet and ruin the surprise party. For that matter, I didn’t want Drew to hear mysterious rumblings in the closet and get the wrong idea if he saw us come out.
My shocked inaction provided an opening for Akai to escalate things that really sent my heart racing in a flurry of mixed emotions. The hands that were around my waist slowly moved back to join his face. I stood aghast and incredulous at his gall and audacity as he began palming my ass and then squeezing it. Soon I was on the receiving end of a full-out deep tissue butt massage, all while he continued to rub his face up and down along my crack.
Things had turned weirdly sexual, and I was at a loss for what to do about it. With a sudden jolt of my hips I pushed his face back, but Akai was determined and within a split second his face was right back in my butt. His hands never left, kneading my cheeks with his strong fingers, meeting the resistance of the lifetime of tension I held confined in those muscles. I’m sure I knew subconsciously, but my conscious mind had no idea how much anxiety I held in my glutes, trapped like a tightly wound spring of kinetic energy searching for release. I was therefore equally shocked at the very visceral reaction my body had to this attention. The release of tension felt good — damn good — and I struggled emotionally with the conflict raging in my head while I stood there. Half my brain screamed ‘STOP! Nivia, what the hell are you doing?’ The other half wanted him to do it harder.
I really got nervous when I realized that the release of tension centered around my deepest insecurity was having a profound effect on my mind and body. Surprisingly, I found myself responding to Akai’s ministrations. With his relentless kneading and pulling he turned raw, stiff dough soft and pliant, and I felt the weight of so much pent up anxiety began to slowly seep out of me from behind. The nervous energy released from my cheeks turned into a subtle heat that settled in my core. In shame I felt a pool of moisture forming between my lips and realized this had gone way too far. I needed to stop things before both Akai and Debbie sensed exactly what was going on between my legs.
As if sensing all my fears, I heard a double whiff intake of breath arise from behind me, testing the air for the hint of musk that would surely give me away if detected. I held my legs together tight, and all the muscles in my lower body tensed. On my trail like a blood hound, I felt Akai press his nose into the lower cleft of my backside and then heard him inhale deeply.
“Mmmm,” he groaned, barely audibly, confirming his suspicion of my arousal.
“Stop it!” I hissed in a whisper.
“Uh-uh,” he whispered back. And then a low chuckle, mocking me for enjoying his ministrations.
“What the hell is going on with you two?!” Debbie whispered. “You both need to quit.”
But Akai was determined. It was as if getting a whiff of the musky aroma of my excitement had given him license to be even bolder, and suddenly one of his hands began snaking its way up my skirt. That was the last straw; I had to put a stop to him right then and there. I reasoned that if the heel of my stiletto digging into his thigh was not enough to make him quit, then maybe some pressure applied to more sensitive parts would suffice. I didn’t want to truly hurt him, however, just show him that I meant business. So I slipped off my heel and reached back with my foot. I found one thigh and then the other, positioning my foot between them, then moved it back to the junction where the two met.
I had simply planned to gently locate his balls and then apply pressure until he stopped violating me. Instead, I found a big surprise. A long solid shaft of tumescent flesh greeted my foot! What he was doing to me had excited him. Making contact with my foot I felt it throbbing beneath his pants! A low, guttural “mmmm” escaped from my own lips before I could stop myself.
To make matters worse, I had let my guard down. No longer clenching my thighs together, the hand that was worming its way up my skirt made contact with the damp gusset of my panties. My mind was swimming, and I was by then in a full on panic. Outside, Gayle was telling Mike and Drew to have fun at their game. I heard my husband’s voice, right outside the closet door, telling Gayle approximately what time the boys would be back. Meanwhile, my arch nemesis had his hand up my skirt and was pulling the wet crotch of my thong to the side, seeking out the source of its moisture. He found it, and a long thick finger slid right up into my folds just as Gayle announced that we were all clear to come out. Akai slid his finger in and out of me a few times in quick succession and then withdrew it, just as Gayle opened the closet door to let us out.
Debbie stumbled out first as I tried to compose myself. Gayle held the door open for me as I adjusted my skirt and walked out. I saw her nose twitch, and I wondered if she could smell the evidence of what Akai had just done to me. I didn’t look back, I couldn’t look back. I went straight to the kitchen without turning around and got back to making trays of hors d’oeuvres. I was flustered and ashamed of myself, unable to concentrate on what I was doing. I was mad at myself for letting it happen, mad at myself for enjoying it, and then mad at myself for not being able to forget about it.
Eventually I looked up and caught sight of Akai. His hand was near his face, holding his chin, playing with the hairs on his goatee. Once he noticed me looking at him he placed his middle finger right under his nose, and I just knew it was the finger that had been inside of me. He was directly mocking me then, and to add insult to injury, he briefly and discretely slipped the finger into his mouth. He winked at me, savoring the flavor he found. A shudder ran through me, and a fresh wave of moisture seeped out of my core.
I went back to preparing food trays, feeling increasingly guilty and angry at myself for not being able to stop looking at him. Every time I did, he was sure to let me know how much he was enjoying my smell and my taste.
“Earth to Nivia, anybody home?” Gayle asked me, noticing my distracted demeanor. Everyone else was laughing and joking, reminiscing about old times, while I chopped vegetables in silence.
“Girl, I know, I have a million things on my mind,” I lied. In reality, I had one thing on my mind that I couldn’t shake. Finally, I couldn’t take it any longer. When I saw Akai excuse himself to go to the restroom, I followed him. I checked to make sure no one was looking and then slipped into the restroom behind him. He was peeing, and didn’t even seem surprised when he heard me walk in. I stood with my back against the door, scared to move and unsure what to say. I watched his arm shake, indicating the end of his release, and he finally turned around to face me. He had not tucked himself back into his pants. I made a commitment to myself that I wouldn’t look down. No matter what.